Doyle sat at his office desk, trying to keep his mind on the papers he was supposed to be grading. It had been over a week since Doyle had kicked out Bodie, but he still couldn't stop thinking of him. His lover, the way his eyes looked when Ray told him that he wanted him to leave and never come back. Perhaps he had acted too harshly, but enough was enough. all they did lately was fight. It would be better for them in the long run. Susan brought in a note, placed it on Doyle's desk and walked out. Doyle didn't open the note, he could tell by the writing that it was from Bodie. Instead he threw the note on the trash. That act hurt Ray's cracked ribs, and he groaned in pain. Lars looked up from his desk. "You should read the note Ray," "Why should I?" Doyle countered. Since their encounter in the bathroom, their relationship had changed, there was an edge to it that it didn't have before. besides, Doyle knew that Lars was probably telling everything he said to his older brother.. The cracked r ibs ached, everytime he moved he was reminded of the fight he had with Bodie. "You have no idea what he told you," Lars plucked the note out of the trash. Doyle grabbed the note from Lars. He crumpled the note and threw it back into the trash. "Stay out of my life Lars!" "That's a little hard now isn't it! We have to share the same office!" Lars raised his voice. "Why don't you go somewhere else!" "I could tell you the same thing!" Lars calmed down. "We shouldn't fight like this." "You started it," Doyle accused. The next question threw Doyle for a loop. "Why do you hate me?" "I don't hate you," "You don't like me eather," Lars countered. "I know you asked Mai Li to give you another office, not just once, but several times." That surprised Doyle. "How did you know that?" "Mai Li told me," The younger man said simply. ""I've tried to be nice to you, but no matter how hard I try, you won't even give me the time of day. Is it because we fucked?" There was a long pause Doyle couldn't answer. "So that's it Ray, what we had didn't meant the same thing me as it did to you, I was on the streets, a hooker, to me it was just a pleasant encounter." "So you enjoyed it," Doyle asked levely. In answer, Lars held up his left hand, showing the thin band that was on t his left ring finger. "I'm married Ray, I never wanted anything from you except an encounter, when I saw you masturbating, I got carried away. If there's anyone to blame, it's me." "How can you say that?" "It's the truth Ray, I took advantage of you." "Can I ask you a question?" Doyle asked. "Have you ever cheated on Bryant before?" A smile marked Lar's lips for a moment. "That's none of your business. Listen Doyle, I consider you a friend. I don't intentionally hurt a friend." "How do I know your telling me the truth?" Doyle asked. "You don't," He said simply. "You should try and read his letter, you don't know what he said." "All his other notes have said. 'We need to talk'" Lars tilted his head a bit, and he suddenly looked very much like Bodie. "Perhaps this one will be different." Ray bent down and picked up the note. He unwrinkled it and read it. Ray, I know we both said things we didn't mean, but what I said was really stupid. I didn't intend to drive you away from me. I do know that the fight was my fault. If I hadn't been so jelious of Mai Li, then we would still be with me. You weren't just my friend, your where my lover. I've asked Cowley to give me another partner after this assignment. That way you'll never have to work with me again. William Doyle stared down at the note. "He's setting me free." * * * Bodie sat on the settee in the sitting room of Lars and Bryant's apartment. The telly was on, playing some kind of documentary that Bryant was watching on the Hindu channel, the entire thing was in Hindustani, a language Bodie didn't remotely understand, but Bryant seemed to like it, and since it was in his house, Bodie didn't get a choice.. The sitting room was decorated in what Bodie thought of as middle pagan, there was a large wood carving of the green man on one wall. An alter was set up in the east corner, there where several candles lit, and incense burned in a burner. Bodie again wondered why Cowley would draft a Wicca high preast. Bryant came into the room carrying two glasses and a bottle of wine. He sat down beside Bodie on the couch, opened the wine, and poured it in the glasses, he handed one to Bodie. "Are you going to stay with CI5 after this case?" "Why would you ask that?" Bodie asked, he tried to keep the suspicion out of his voice. "Well, if my lover was an agent, and we had broken up, I might leave." "I can't leave, I don't have a choice." "Everyone has a choice Bodie," "I don't," "Why don't you?' "Major Cowley and I have a contract, he's bought me, heart and soul." "He bought you?" Bryant gasped. Bryant was getting much too close to a very sore point, so Bodie decided t o change the subject. "Where's Lars?" "Night class, he won't be home till one or two am." "Why so late?" "He's taking his class out for coffee, don't be surprised if he doesn't come home tonight." "You believe he's just out for coffee?" "let's just say, I don't mind," Bryant took a drink as he did, he stared into Bodie's eyes. Bodie glanced away from him. //Damn this man is seductive!// //He's my brother's lover,// //which means that I should leave him alone.// Bodie drained the wine glass, and put it down on the coffee table. "No offence, but I'm starving, and you haven't mentioned food....." Bryant picked a menu off the coffee table. "there's a place that's got fantasic take away." "Indian or Chinese?" "Chinese, and it's so authentic that I can't read the menu," He showed it to Bodie. "Too bad Ray isn't here," "Why?" "Ray's fluent in Chinese," "I see," Bryant opened the menu and took out a translated copy, it was written in Mai Li's hand. Bryant handed the paper to Bodie. Bodie quickly found something that he wanted to eat, Bryant went and made the call. As Bryant was calling, Bodie looked him over. The man was up to something, Bodie could tell. They had only had sex once, but all ready he felt as if he could read Bryant like a book. Bodie's moustache began to itch, without thinking, he scratched it. Bryant rang off, then turned back to Bodie. He sat back down on the couch. "So what do you think of the documentary?" "I hate it," Bryant smiled at that. "Pick anything you want to watch, I don't care." "Do you have a tv times?" The food came soon after Bodie picked a program to watch. The food was very authentic, and as he ate it, he was reminded of Doyle, his Ray. Goddess, he would have to stop thinking of Ray as his. Ray didn't belong to him any more. He was probably in Mai Li's arms right now. "What does your food taste like?" Bryant asked, looking down to Bodie's plate. Bodie looked down to his Mongolian barbecue, he speared a prawn on his fork, then offered it to Bryant. The other man took the shrimp without touching it with anything but his teeth. Bryant had a way of making the process of eating very sensuous. As he ate, he always maintained eye contact with Bodie. As soon as Bodie was threw eating, he kissed Bodie. Bodie pulled away from him. "I don't think this is a very good idea." "Why not?" "What if Lars walked in on us?" "So?" Bryant countered. "You never know, he might even want to join us." "Lars is my brother " Bryant reached out a finger and began to trace Bodie's face. "if you want to know the truth, Lars and I had a talk, we decided that it would be wrong for you to sleep alone." "The two of you decided that did you?" "Yes, we did," Bryant's caresses began to go lower. "Don't say you don't want me." "I have to admit, your a temptation." Bryant smiled preditorily. "Good," "It wouldn't be fair to you if we have sex," "Because you can't stop thinking of Ray," Bryant said as if reading Bodie's mind. His hand dipped lower. "it might help if you pretend that I'm Ray," Bryant kissed Bodie again, running his hand to Bodie's groin, he began to rub. //Mindless sex, that's what I need right now, mindless sex.// Bodie began to fumble with the belt on Bryant's pants. He unfastened the belt, then opened the pants, he slipped his hand in and let his hand cup the mans buttocks, letting a finger slip into the tight anus, and pulled him toward him. Bryant groaned, and relaxed, letting Bodie put another finger into the anus. As Bodie finger-fucked Bryant, the other man opened up Bodie's pants and began to suck on his cock. As he did, he somehow took off his pants, and his mouth left Bodie's cock. His eyes where black with desire. "How do you want me?" "On my lap," was the command, Bodie withdrew the fingers, and the tall man sat down on Bodie's lap. Slowly, very slowly taking the other man into him. Then Bryant began to ride up and down on Bodie's penis. After Bodie came, Bryant slid off of him, his head resting on Bodie's shoulder. Bodie put his arm around him, holding him close. He could feel Bryant's cock pressing against his thigh, this man had a need too. "Why don't we finish this in bed," Bodie suggested. "We're all ready finished," Bodie fingered Bryant's cock, which jumped as he touched it. "We've only started." * * * Liam and Michael Murphy sat together at a pub near the University. It wasn't the gay pub, instead, it was a skinhead pub. It even had a swatiska on one wall. "I thought you had class today, " Liam asked his brother. "I did, but that poof made a pass at me," Michael's eyes flashed. "What poof?" "Professor Lang, I know I'm his assistant, but that doesn't give him the right to kiss me!" "Scum like him shouldn't be allowed to live in Britain," Murphy couldn't help but noticed that the skinhead bartender was listening in on their conversation as he pretended to polish glasses. "Too right," Michael said. he took a long drink on his beer. Michael was a contrast to his brother, he had golden hair, and sable eyes. Their features where different, but the brothers where of the same hight and build. "How's the wife?" "Who knows, she left me, good riddance really. Found out she was a dyke." "Your better off without her," "What about your wife? Aren't you worried because she's secretary to a poof?" "Look at it this way, Lang won't make a pass at her, now will he?" Just then Doyle came into the pub. He walked over to Michael. "What the hell are you doing here?" "Drinking," Michael said simply. "Your supposed to be tutoring a class!" "Why don't you do it?" Murphy stood up . "Michael is the one assigned to tutor the class," "Go to hell poof!" Michael sneered. "You could get the sack for this!" Michael stood up. "Would you like for me to tell Dr. Ng that you are hitting on your male assistants?" Murphy noticed with some satisfaction that the pub had grown quiet and that everyone was watching them. "That wouldn't work would it? She's a poof too!" "There is nothing wrong with being gay." Doyle said simply. "Nothing wrong!" Murphy shouted. "I'm not the one that seduces little boys!" "I am not a child molester!" "Do you have any proof to that? I could pound you into the pavement!" Murphy lashed out, hitting Doyle in the face, Doyle fell to the ground, his lip cut and bleeding. He then punched Doyle in the stomach and countered by punching him in the eye. Doyle's eyes burned with hatred. "You'll pay for this!" "Like hell I will!" Murphy spat. "From now on stay away from Mr. Micheals, because if you touch him again, I'll kill you!" "Get him out of here!" The bartender said. "We don't like faggots coming in and starting fights.' "You better walk to professor back to his office." Murphy told his brother. "Don't want him getting hurt do we?" Michael smiled slyly. "No we wouldn't." Michael walked Doyle to the door, as they went outside, Murphy could see Michael punch Doyle, and pull him into the ally. Murphy turned back to the bar, he was going to get another beer, but his glass was empty. The bartender smiled at Murphy and poured him another pint. "That was wonderful what you did." Murphy didn't feel that wonderful, but instead of saying that, said. "It was nothing," "Nothing!" The man said with some admiration. "We need more men l ike you in England, one that isn't afraid to put the boot in." "That I can do," Murphy took another drink. "Markus James," The man said. "Liam Murphy," The man's eyes narrowed. "That's an Irish name, are you Catholic?" "Good God no!" Murphy lied. "I'm a prodistent. When I lived in Dublin I was part of the Orange and Blue movement." "Wow, a member of the Orange and Blue, so you fought against the foreigners before." "Not just fought, killed." That made James smile. "There is a club for people who think like you do, would you be interested in coming to a party?" "Might," Murphy said. "It's tomorrow night, eight o'clock. You can bring your wife if you'd like." "So there will be woman there," "Of course, there are some lookers who belong to our club, their very happy to give a white man some confort, whats even better, they don't tell your wife." "Where's the party?" Murphy asked. * * * An hour later, Murphy returned to his office. He put a do not disturb sign on the door and locked it. He then went to the door that connected his office to Doyle's. He knew that the same sign was on Doyle's door, but that could be only for the rabble. He found Doyle sitting at his desk, he looked extremely haggard, his lip was swollen, and both of his eyes where black. Jenn Bryant was looking him over. She glared at Murphy. "I'm beginning to think that the whole orgization is mad, you keep beating up on each other." "I keep telling you, I asked Murphy to do this to me," Ray said through the lip. "I think that proves my theory." She looked back down to Doyle's head. "God Ray, I didn't mean to hurt you that much....." Murphy said. "You had help, Michael," "What did Michael do to you?" Jenn asked. "he helped me into the ally, and cracked my head against a wall." Doyle explained. "I should tell Mai Li about this!" Doyle looked up to Jenn. "This is a CI5 matter, let's not get Mai Li involved." "Mai Li's your.." Before she could reveal the secret, Ray said. "If you have any problem with the way we're treating each other, I suggest you take it to Major Cowley." Just then Susan Fisher came into Doyle's office carrying a tray. She put the tray on Doyle's desk, and poured him a cuppa. She handed it to him. "Thanks Susan," "Anyone else want some?" Susan asked. "I'll take some," Murphy said. Susan poured him a cup of tea, and handed it to him, he kissed her gently on the lips. "I can't believe you actually made tea." "It's part of my cover," Susan shrugged. "So What happened when I left?" Doyle asked. "I think I've finally made contact with the hate group," Murphy said. "They've invited Susie, Michael and I to a party." "Why kind of party?" Susan asked. "For people that think like them, you know, people that hate Catholics, gays.." "So your new friends don't know your Catholic?" "Of course they don't, blow open my whole cover wouldn't it?" Murphy c ountered, he pulled Susan into his arms. "You better come with me, I've heard their girls are very accommodating," "Is that all you ever think of?" Susan teased. * * * Doyle was sitting at his desk, he had a sketch pad in front of him, he was s lowly sketching a picture of Bodie. The way Ray remembered him, before... Before the fight, before the harsh words. They hadn't fought like that ever before, at least not so violently . Bodie had stopped going to Doyle's office. He now spent most of his time with his brother Lars and Bryant. But then, Bodie probably didn't have anyone else to spend time with. "What are you doing?" Michael asked, he was standing in the doorway of Doyle's office. "Nothing," "Can I come in?" "It's a free world," Michael came into the office, he pushed the door shut. "It's not nothing, you've got Bodie on the mind." "What makes you think that?" "I know you," Michael sat down in the chair beside the Doyle's desk. "Listen Bodie, it might help if you talk about it." "I don't want to talk about it," He went back to the sketching. "Are you angry at me because of the attack? I'm sorry that I got so carried away." Doyle stopped sketching. "The attack was my idea. Yes you hurt me, but that was my fault, I should have stopped you before I did." "You should have stopped me Ray." Michael said firmly. "Yeah, I should have." He looked up to agent. "I trust you, that's why I didn't do anything." "I don't think you know how much that means to me." Michael looked around the room. "Everything seems to be so strange since I broke up with Bodie," Doyle finally said. "I feel as if I'm alone." "You are alone if you give up your partner." "I wonder if I did the right thing," Doyle continued. "I still love him. You can't imagine how it's like to leave someone you love." Michael got a far away look in his chestnut eyes. "I know more then you will ever know." "When did it happen?" "A few years back, when I was stationed in the States." "Why did you leave her?" "I didn't leave her, she left me." "I'm sorry Mike...." "It isn't your fault," There was pain in Michael's voice. "Her name was Laura, Laura Holt." "Pretty?" "More then pretty, she was beautiful. We worked at the same detective agency." "Was she your secretary?" "No, she was an agent. We worked together and loved each other for almost ten years, until he showed up." Doyle could hear the bitterness in Michael's voice. "Who was he?" "Harry Penhalligan, Cowley assigned him to be my partner, Laura fell for him hard." "She left you," "She kept going back and forth between us, until I was recalled." "What about Bernice?" Doyle asked, Bernice was Michael's wife. "One day, when I was really depressed, Bernice was there, we became involved, when I was told to come home, I asked her to come home with me, and she did." Doyle didn't understand why Bernice would do that. "Did she know about your love for Laura?" "Yes, she did." "How can you live with someone you don't love?" "I love Bernice, very much. When someone like this happens, you grow, you find that you can find a place for someone else." "You think I'll find someone else," Ray said levely. "I know you will." Michael promised. * * * Bodie went to the apartment he had once shared with Doyle. Cowley had grudgly accepted Bodie's request for transfer, but said that Bodie and Doyle would have to work together on this assignment. That meant that they would have to live together. He tried his key in the lock, but Ray had changed that. He took a small pick out of his pocket and picked the lock. It was dark inside, but he didn't bother to turn on the light, instead he used the small pin light he had in his pocket. There was no one in the sitting room, even though it was still pretty early. He found Doyle in the bedroom, lying on what was once their bed. He was asleep, his face filled with cuts and bruises. A lump rose in Bodie's throat. //Did I do that to him?// He walked closer to Doyle, both of his eyes where blackened, his lip cut. Bodie now knew that in his rage, he had destroyed everything t hat he had with Doyle. Doyle opened his eyes, he looked like a trapped animal, too frightened to speak. "I'm sorry Ray," Bodie finally said. "Is that suppose to matter to me?" There was hatred in his voice. "No, I suppose it doesn't," "How did you get in here?" "I did a bit of the old B and E." "You broke in, I should have known. "Doyle started shouting. "Well, that's great, just great, now get out of here!" "I can't leave," "Give me one good reason why you can't leave." "Cowley's ordered us to work together." "Did you tell him what happened?" "Murphy did, he didn't tell him exactly what happened, just that we had a row." "So you came back here because of Cowley's orders." Doyle calmed down a bit. "Yes, I did." "From now on, you can sleep in the guest room." "If that's what you want," Bodie said levely. "What happened to my face wasn't because of you," Doyle said. "We had a fight, and I beat you up," Bodie said simply. "You didn't do this, it was the Murphy brothers." "Why would they do this to you?" "It was to keep up the cover, Murphy has finally gotten into contact with the racist group." "I see," Even though Bodie didn't see. "Liam didn't have to beat your face in." "He had help from Michael." "Do you need some ice?" "I'll be all right, Jenn prescribed me some pain pills." "Have you had dinner yet?" "No, I'll make some." doyle began to sit up, but Bodie found himself holding him down. "You've had enough action for today." "You do?" "Yes sunshine I do," Bodie had an overwhelming urge to kiss Doyle, but fought it down. "What did I do to you?" "You gave me a concussion and three cracked ribs," "Great goddess!" Bodie sighed. "When I saw you and Mai Li together, I was jelious, I didn't know I should get so jelious." "There's nothing to be jelous of," Ray said coldly. "The point is, what happened to you today made you an open target, " "I can take care of myself," "Not the way you are now," Bodie paused. "If we watch each others backs, we'll be safer, this isn't your usual gay bashing, it's a war, people have been killed." "I know it is a war." Bodie decided to tell Doyle his idea. "I don't think we should have an open relationship for this assignment." "We don't have a relationship," Doyle reminded him. "If we're catting around, we won't be there to watch each other's back, we're supposed to be a couple." "You know what happened the last time we had a commitment." "This is different Ray, this is your safety we're talking about." "We'll have a commitment, for this assignment, but when the assignment is through, so are we." "I understand." Bodie said. * * * The next morning, while Ray was fixing breakfast, Mai Li let herself into the apartment. "What smells so good?" "Breakfast," Doyle showed her what he was cooking. "We've got to stop meeting like this." That brought a smile to his sister's face. "Can I have some breakfast?" "There's enough for everyone." Doyle said. He took out another plate. Mai Li looked at the plates. "Did someone sleep over last night?" "Bodie's moved back in." "Why in the goddesses name would you let that monster move back in?" Mai Li demanded. "Did he do that to your face?" "No, the Murphy brothers did, it was part of the cover." "You look awful, are you sure Bodie didn't do that to you?" :I'm positive." "You shouldn't have made up with Bodie," "Why shouldn't I?" Doyle asked. "He's mad Ray, he'll hurt you." "This is just part of the assignment, when the assignment is over, he's going to be gone." "Finally, you've gotten some sense into you." Mai Li smiled. "You know, I should do something to Murphy." "You don't have to do that." "It would make your cover more realistic looking if I chew him out in public, and make sure that plenty of people see me. It will make more waves." "Are you sure it will help?" "If it had really happened, I would have had him fired." Just then Bodie came into the kitchen, his eyes narrowed, but he didn't say anything, instead he went to the cabinet, and got out a bowl, he poured some cereal into the bowl, went to the refrigerator, poured some milk into the cereal and began to eat. He didn't even bother to speak to them. "I better go," Mai Li said. "I'll see you at the office." Mai Li left, Doyle picked up the cereal box. "Honey Nut Loops, can't you find anything more nutritious to eat?" Bodie didn't answer, and the silence stretched out between them. It would have felt better if Bodie was angry, or acted like nothing had happened, but their not talking was driving Doyle mad. "We can't act like enemies it will hurt our cover." "We're not in public," Bodie finally said. "I forgive you for hurting me," "That's not the problem, I can't forgive myself." With that, Bodie left the room. * * Bodie didn't know what to expect from a Wicca handfasting, even though he was a pagan, he had always preferred to practice on his own. Bryant would officiate the ceremony, and it struck Bodie as being very strange that Mai Li was a Druid. He had to admit that she looked beautiful. Both Mai Li and Jenn Bryant went skyclad, and a crown of flowers in their hair. Even Mai Li's daughter was there, wearing a white party dress, her cap of curls crowned with flowers. Her eyes green and almond shaped, so much like her fathers. There was only one thing that gave Bodie a pang of jealousy, Ray was acting as Mai Li's witness, he too was skyclad, wearing nothing except his skin. The ceremony took place in the local woods, on a farm of a coven member. The event was skyclad optional, and Bodie was one of the few that chose to wear clothes. He just didn't feel comfortable being nude in public. The ceremony was ended when first Win Lu offered a plate of fruit to Herne the hunter, she placed the plate beside a sacred tree. Then Ray did the same thing, then Finally Jenn and Mai Li offered a plate together. Bryant dissolved the circle and invited everyone to a reception. Then he put on a black robe, he handed a robe to Ray, who put it on, Ray's robe was dark brown and contrasted with his skin. The reception was held outside. There was a table with drinks, Bodie wandered over to the table. Glyniss was standing behind it. "It seems like you always tend bar," Bodie teased. "Seems like it, " She smiled. "I don't mind though, I'm the only one here that can mix a decent drink," "That you can," "Can I get you something to drink?" "A double scotch," The blond poured him one, and Bodie moved away from the table, Bryant walked over to him. "Hello Bodie," "Brendan," "What did you think of the ceremony?" "It was nice," Bryant moved closer to Bodie, so that they where almost touching. "I really enjoyed the time you spent with me, " "I enjoyed it too," "Do you think we could get together sometime?" Bodie decided to be non-committal. "Perhaps," Bryant's lips touched Bodie's ear. "We could slip away for awhile, no one would miss us," Bodie was tempted, Bryant had been very good in bed, almost as good as Ray, but he had Ray to think about now, if Bodie went home with Bryant, t here would be no one to go home with Ray. Ray walked over to them, his black eyes now turning all sorts of strange colours. As he looked at Ray, he knew what his decision must be. "I'm sorry Bryant, but I've already got plans for tonight," "Perhaps another night then," Bryant walked away. "You didn't have to do that on my behalf," Ray said harshly. "We have an assignment, remember?" Bodie reminded him. "Bryant knows we're not really together, so why don't you go off and screw him?" There was bitterness in Doyle's voice. "I don't want Bryant any more," "How can you say that?" Doyle asked. "It's the truth, that's why." A couple of coven members walked by them, they looked at Bodie and Doyle strangely. Doyle pulled Bodie to him, kissing him full on the lips. Bodie sighed and kissed Ray with a long forgotten passion. Bodie thought Ray had forgiven him when Ray pulled away from him, there was hatred written in his eyes. "Good, their gone," "What do you mean?" "We still have to keep our cover remember?" Ray asked scarscam dripping in his voice. "So the kiss meant nothing," "Less then nothing." Doyle walked away. * * *